enforcer's slimyboy thoughts

I noticed this back when I ended up stuck here waiting for Brady's friends to leave and doing, like, 7 or 8 total songs, with filling TDIMIY with all my withering contempt -- it WORKS and it hits the attitude and I can basically lash out at people and have them enjoy it and the fact that I can channel Ronnie so damned well is a bit scary.

The emotion Pick Up The Phone makes me feel is probably not healthy and not trauma informed, especially if you cross reference it with Sally's testimonies...but goddamn if it isn't fun, and isn't well composed. Got to do some fun switching vocals. I wish more less disgusting FIR songs were available...

I did kinda go hard because the bikers etc were back, although that is all I will be doing because that after Your Betrayal was perhaps a bit much esp since there is still a bit of slime, but I decided I was asymptomatic enough to present and the fans wanted me.

the trick I have discovered for FIR delivery is to focus on how much I despise Ronnie. honestly I think the fact that I was somewhat ragged from the preceding song may have helped with this one Re: effect. Response was good especially from that one full gear biker's wife who has quite enjoyed my work before.

arguably perhaps it becomes less problematic without Ronnie since I have legitimate people with legitimate reasons to be mad at although PUTP is questionable to begin with

fir with like 85% less ronnie (I can't say 100% because of the apparition that sits on my shoulder among other things)

I could destroy everything you hold dear. It wouldn't be hard.

i just want to live in a cave and only know "predatory" as referring to creatures who actually want to eat me

...

been flirting with a blatantly horny story featuring 06...unsure if i want to cuddle him or i want to be him and be cuddled

t'would be weird to draw enforcer w/ronnie not the least of which because he is taller than me and that's not allowed but fates is ronnie but short and also kinda our imaginary boyfriend whom hangs out with us so maybe if i make them a design we would both enjoy getting art of us hanging out

honestly if you look like ronnie escape the fate but short and either trans or gay and girlier than i am hit me up

anyway we're still pretty damned blurry with fates and feel like generalized shit. blocker is now enabled on work computer librewolf incognito mode bcuz i ended up on tumblr again

imma be honest soft pastel aesthetics on some level make me uncomfortable even if they aren't mixed in with discourse (tm)

please stop using the term "ipad kid" or variants thereof; you are flirting dangerously closely with "having special interests / using devices to self-soothe is inherently bad" and it isn't the ipad, or the kid, who is the actual problem; it's platform designers and the parents

you can just bite str8 into a bread from the side and no 1 will stop u

Recommend it's fun for werewolves grab bite and TEAR then insufficiently chew

maybe we can play some pkmn? perhaps in frnech

SHUT THR FUCK UP

Shit I dunno what I wanna do. Can't do exscape teh fate shit bcuz we still got a headache so listening to edgy music or huntin for graphics is out

Don't really wanna do Coli or lingo legend but I don't want to just read. Could go 4 a walk but...where and that isn't fun without music and also FUCK SNOW

roses are red, violets are blue, i am an asshole, but i'm just like you

I've been getting red bull as my energy drink of choice when I'm doing in person grocery trips (can't justify doordash unless it's not safe to go outside or I need a lot of hard to carry stuff), because I like its flavor better than monster white or green, and the cans / boxes are smaller ergo easier to transport.

why I feel like shit (and why I couldn't sleep) today has been identified -- I probably shouldn't have gotten a 4-pack of red bull, 2 liters of apple juice, and a big bag of "naturally imperfect" apples on the same grocery trip. And I should have brought two bags and not carried both liquids, and all my groceries except the apples which I carried in the other hand because they wouldn't fit, in a single bag on my left shoulder.

whazzup I had horrid dreams and feel like a cigarette butt floating in a toilet, and the song stuck in head is the FIR cover of gangstas' paradise let's go it's nasty boy time

perhaps I can get fates to work with me on an awful bc entry for our awful ronald shoyru

I would settle for a plausibly proportioned, quadrupedal leucistic axolotl, or an anthro axolotl that actually...lived underwater, but that doesn't seem to exist.

Zoo gift shops / wild republic / Scleich doesn't count for this purpose. That's not the mainstream portrayals of animals. Mammals and other herps may be stylized in toys and cartoons, but they get furry reminders. They're...acknowledged as being existent animals. Axolotls aren't.

A realization while revising the turtles / herps in fiction slides for today: wild type axolotls don't exist. Every other kind of herp you can get toys of, you can get toys with realistic colors and proportions. They might be in the "scare your friends" aisle, and may still be too bright of green and stylized, but you can find plastic / rubber snakes with plausible patterns, green and/or spotted frogs and crocodiles, and green / brown / striped lizards.

There are no wild type axolotls available as toys. Hell, there are no quadrupedal axolotls available as toys outside of the Build-A-Bear ones who have suspiciously mammalian legs. Axolotls are cartoonified to the point of pure fiction, given that they're as a rule incredibly stylized, in designer colors, and completely disconnected from any actual environments or animal behavior even more so than other herps and cute mammals. I've never seen a cute toy axolotl that's actually...an aquatic animal.

Even among anthro axolotls, I've never seen one that gets to enjoy the lily pad / pond / etcetera tropes of frogs, gators, and fish. And most of them are bipedal and tend to have more mammalian than amphibious anatomy even they're quad. They aren't considered real animals, hence why they get conflated with such things as unicorns and fantastical hybrids.

Also, there IS an X in expresso, which I think is also a French loanword to start with, so perhaps Weird Al was wrong.

got to LL cafe unit. learned translation for an Americano. Had to look up what that was.

Joltik canonically eats electricity from larger Pokemon, but there are also plenty of smaller, less charismatic parasites that either physically eat Pokemon's bodily secretions or feed off of electricity / animum / whatever else a Pokemon emanates.

The animum-eating ones are probably technically Pokemon, phylogenetically speaking, but not of the intelligent, trainable variety that it's socially frowned upon to kill.

dudesverse bio tidbit: Trainers who regularly mega evolve their Pokemon usually need to give them probiotics, because internal flora / fauna including "good" gut bacteria often die off when there's a major internal animum surge producing transformation. While there are microbes that are specifically adapted to live in Pokemon, Mega Evolution is by its very nature physiologically costly.

This is also relevant for Pokemon who evolve the standard way, but is more so for megas because that's repeatable. You don't want to deal with a Charizard with diarrhea after every battle in which you go X / Y.

Internal bacteria / viruses / etc. not surviving animum surges is also why Ronnie (or any other theoretical Draggian Universe werebeast or voluntary shapeshifter) isn't a vector for zoonotic diseases. The drastic changes in body chemistry and animum when he transforms kill off anything living inside his body. He does need to be vaccinated for both human and canine diseases, though, because when in either human or wolf form he's biologically equivalent to a standard member of that species and could get sick. Also, intentionally shapeshifting from human to wolf requires mental focus and concentration -- he probably wouldn't be able to if he were sick. Shifting with the full moon happens automatically. He also can't sustain focus to turn back when he's a wolf so has to wait until daylight if he turns voluntarily.

Werewolves absolutely get fleas, and those probably could stick around through shapeshifting -- internal pathogens wouldn't survive the drastic shift in body chemistry and the animum surge, but external parasites don't care. 06 also still has fur even in human form -- even if he doesn't have the ears and tail, everywhere on his body that a human guy would grow hair has the texture, composition, and density of the fur in his were form. And yes, there are also parasites that specifically live on Pokemon, both of the physical blood or dead skin-eating and of the animum-consuming variety.

If I were writing about this, I'd go with the "conceptual self" option -- using a wheelchair or whatever is part of you as a concept, so it shapeshifts with you. The other options are logistically interesting, though.

also, the idea of Arlo having to give 06 some nighttime med in a dog pill pocket (because he is NOT sapient when shifted; he likes / dislikes the same people but he is mentally a dog) is pretty funny

In the scenario where your were form isn't also disabled, but your aids don't travel with you, the best option is either if you maintain enough control to do that, come back to the same place every night to shift back and have a spare cane / wheelchair / whatever there, or have a human assistant for your pack who carries your aids with them.

Also, if you're a werewolf but you have to take nighttime meds (even if the condition for which you take them isn't sustained when you're a wolf, you'll probably feel it when you turn back in the morning assuming your chemistry is reset to what it was pre-shift), does someone have to hold your mouth open or give them to you in a pill pocket? I guess if you're sapient enough when shifted to recognize what your pills are and remember you need to take them, you could take them out and lay them out somewhere accessible before you transform on the night of a full moon.

It would suck to be a physically disabled werewolf (or other werebeast, but I'm going to talk about werewolves.)

Concern 1: are disability aids considered part of your body for shapeshifting purposes? I would hold that yes, they are. Animum is the seat of self-concept -- if your conceptual self has a prosthetic limb / uses a wheelchair / is blind / etcetera, that would be maintained while shapeshifting. But not all works would agree with me.

Concern 2: if disability aids travel with your body, do they automatically change forms with you? E.g. if you have a prosthetic limb, and you turn into a wolf, does your wolf form automatically have a wolf-anatomy prosthetic limb or would you need to get one separately?

Concern 3: is your were form also disabled? This combines badly with the scenario where your aids aren't considered part of your body and don't shift with you. Suppose we have a werewolf who uses a wheelchair, and their were form isn't disabled. They turn into a werewolf, get out of the chair, run off and eat some sheep or something, and then they turn back into a human and they can't move. If your were form is also disabled, but aids don't travel with you, someone has to put on your mobility aids. You probably can't do that yourself, even if you're sapient, without opposable thumbs.

Now, practically speaking, I can't think of a good reason why the same biomagic that can turn a person into a wolf and violate the law of conservation of mass to do it couldn't regrow a limb. The two main reasons I've seen for why characters remain physically disabled in magical settings (other than, y'know, personal choice and how not everyone wants to be "cured") are that either body-shaping magic is rare / expensive / dangerous such that it's not viable in that situation, or it's a kind of injury that also damages magic-stuff, like, you got your arm cut off by a cursed sword and it also damaged your soul so it can't grow back. A natural or acquired werewolf transformation wouldn't have those issues.

I'm on the Lingo Legend "food and drink" unit -- the section I'm on for "at the bar" was introduced with "the drinking age in Quebec is 18, one year earlier than most Canadian provinces, including Ontario!"

Interesting cultural tidbit, or reveal of the Canadian French unit's target audience? I have heard that Quebec is known as something of a party province, hence the nickname I've appropriated for my current locale of No Funswick, allegedly used by "Nova Scotians who drive through it to party in Quebec".

I wonder if their Spanish unit is similarly geared towards US students who want to drink in Mexico?

Daily song stuck in head -- Orgy - Come Back

Happy Family Day (CA), I guess. I don't have class today so my plans are to watch some longer videos I need to for assignments this week and get groceries.

I've been feeling more werewolf vibes lately and I'm uncertain as to why. It isn't a full moon, and I don't usually get the fur and leg shaking when I wake up and shit, but I have lately and it's definitely a mammal vs. the generalized ferality I get every full moon. Perhaps it's Fates blurring in; the lines between us are pretty damned vague to start with hence why I don't consider ourself plural.

There are few vegetables and fruits I dislike, but the ones I dislike I do so strongly. Those being honeydew melons and celery. So, of course, those are common in standard mixes.

I have the celery from a veggie tray in my fridge right now. I bought it for a class potluck and was hoping someone would save me from the celery, but nobody did. The carrots, broccoli, and cauliflower I all like and ate. I don't like wasting food, but I also just really dislike celery. It's like eating grass but tougher. (And I have eaten grass, just off the ground.)

#TrueNorth experiences...

Getting the trash down to the curb was remarkably difficult. At least Ben shoveled snow so there's actually a path, but not only was it extremely difficult to get the bin rolling, I had to brute force shove it from multiple directions and do some digging to get it to move at all, because I think one of the wheels froze and embedded itself in the ground.

Per our trash can's label, it's "ideal for the North American climate", and produced in Canada.

I wonder if they make trash cans with snow tires...and presumably guards to keep polar bears out.

It would not be so bad if our trash cans didn't sit on an elevated surface vs. the rest of the yard.

Having a helluva Giratina origin day today...can tell 'cause the tail is way thicker than usual and I've got the tendrils and the back spikes. Also feeling distorted af and not in a fun way although part of that may be the chronic pain

Song of the day: Bring Me The Horizon - And The Snakes Start To Sing

I think the reason I haven't been sleeping well might be my retainer. I took it off the past week / 2 because it made my mouth feel really gross and hurt when I had a bad cold, and even though I'm not that congested I'm having a way easier time getting to sleep and staying asleep without it?

I consider not being miserable when I have to get up at 7:30 to be more important than teeth straightening, especially since I have worn some sort of correction since 2018 and it seems I sleep with my mouth open these days.

Song of the day: Dead Rabbitts - Trapped

Song of the day: Slipknot - Pulse of the Maggots

You B[ifecto My Feet

featuring a heart that looks uncannily like a condom

pretty sure the Live Hoileter is next to a pile of shit

Also note: bee with dog nose, pig with furry ears

it is always virtuous to make fun of bullshit-generated images

I"Eher Honey! Live Hoileter! I Love Ch*erish You'

let's see how long we can maintain a Song of the Day based on the random shit that gets stuck in my head

Escape the Fate - Liars and Monsters (links to Yewchube)

inexplicable song of the day: My Chemical Romance - Helena (So Long And Goodnight) - links to Yewchube

example of how you totally use algebraic thinking and fractions in daily life: noodle brick required 400 mL of water. available cup measures were in cups: 1, 1/2, 1/3, and 1/8.

I did 1 + 2/3 + 1/8, figuring the extra covered for boiling off.

I am not of the subculture that finds it cool to have a virulent hatred of the imperial system. I support the US switching to metric for consistency's sake and ease of international communication and trade, but unless you're doing science which is pretty standardized anyway, unit aware computing mostly negates the issue. I do wish that cooking instructions / vessels in Canada were consistent.

I did cheat and use a search engine to convert, although I'm modestly proud of myself for estimating "that's, like, two cups, right?" (it's about 1.7) first

https://items.jellyneo.net/item/41767/

the image here is baby me begging my mom to buy neocash cards so I could get this. (note that I had no pets / OCs yet whom this went with in February 2011.) rewired my fuckin brain

glad she was willing to do that as a reward for sustained good behavior / xmas-birthday gifts, because NC trading has gotten me quite a lot of fun value, more so than I can say for most gifts from 15 years ago

(I did finally get my sword 10 years later.)

the edgy sweetheart grams continue to serve up, as they have since 2011. appreciate that bars are just blatantly canon now. (well, all of this serves except those contacts, which are just creepy.)

https://items.jellyneo.net/item/82905/

Figuring I can go for trading for the items I want, offering either within reason custom or the more femme / didn't look good on Hissies items from the Neopies, vs. buying grams myself.

I do think Neo has realized in the past 2 years who a major part of their audience is, or possibly got someone on the wearable team who likes drawing edgy fashion; there have been a lot more blatantly emo / goth / punk / etc. wearables even outside of Valentine's and Halloween. Wonder if it's the same staff member as the MCR items.

This also puts some holes in the Ronnie / Craig feud. One of the main things cited against Craig is that "he said I was on heroin in prison when I wasn't!" but uh, yeah, Ronnie was, so...

And if he ends up getting demolished by facts and logic, and folks being calm and reasonable with him, then that's even better because it's a victory for my methods rather than FIR fans Maenading him.

It all connects back to the merch store outage in 2023-24. Amazing. I'm such a good prophet.

I would feel bad for him, and I do in the past tense Re: how his case worker assaulting him seems like the most plausible explanation, but this is just absolute poetry. His very self-aggrandizing narrative and shitty auction livestreams are what's revealing that the entire core concept of FIR is a lie.

Guess what, buddy? If you hadn't thrown a tantrum about turning 40 and taken down your merch store back in '23, no one would give a shit about I Can Explain because no one gave a shit about your merch until it became the only way to interact with you!

And the combo of it with FIR fans and even his favorite scam platform getting sick of him since 2024 (even if they're still willing to ruin Britney's life on his behalf) is just excellent.

I think this might do it, Re: the meltdown that destroys FIR, since that's Ronnie's entire core backstory is "I'm just a little guy and can't be held accountable for anything because I had to FEND FOR MYSELF in PRISON and PULLED MYSELF UP BY MY BOOTSTRAPS!" ...and that's how FIR fans justify liking him, is that he's "improved" and "made good for himself" and was just a sad lonely little guy and nobody helped him. Ignoring Max and Derek, of course.

The entire core concept of Falling In Reverse is crumbling, and the music also sucks, and they haven't made money since 2023. I'm so into this. The destruction coming via folks being honest with nothing against Ronnie is even better...

Yes, I know I have been prophecizing doom since January 2024. Don't spoil my fun.

That's a frequent theme in how FIR fans justify supporting him despite his not yielding returns for them or anyone, is that he's made good for himself and it's inspirational how he did all this stuff by himself in prison...nope, it was all his friends covering his ass whom he didn't credit, and everything that went wrong is his fault (save maybe being assaulted by his case worker).

And, well, people honestly being disappointed with him REALLY gets under Ronnie's skin. See how he's been unable to stop obsessing over Chris Motionless simply refusing to engage with him starting in 2022, and how my email got a 4 minute RSD spiral and 3 graphics. Combine that with his fragile self-concept that's synonymous with FIR, and synonymous with his trauma (which is extremely unhealthy; he's basically retraumatizing himself every time he sings his silly little songs)...

I use ICE as my baseline source because it's the most detailed one we have, and is the unified version of Ronnie's version of canon as of 2022. I use ICE being cross-referenced by input from people other than Ronnie (mostly the fantastic interviews with Max) as sufficient basis that something probably actually happened.

All of this is consistent with ICE, in that it covers bits he left out, like how exactly starting a band in prison happened.

From my mom: "And the fact that other people who were in the same prison are coming in and responding under their given names, when they literally have nothing to gain and could potentially lose depending on how aware those around them are of their history speaks volumes. They didn’t speak out until Ronnie’s fans started calling folks they were in prison with liars."

I don't think anyone here is in this for self promotion, or to attack or praise Ronnie. Which means they're better than most "journalists" in the field, including actually citing sources and admitting where they have gaps. This is something I have never seen in the FIR ecosystem before, and the fact that it aims to obliterate the entire distorted claim of Ronnie's canonical origins is even better.

I'm pretty restrained about the prison stuff in ICE except where it directly relates to the band out of respect for Ronnie's trauma as a human being -- he has the right to share as much as he is comfortable with without being questioned -- but this is new information about the entire origin and conceit of FIR so is relevant. Like, I have not dug into prison records because that would feel like a violation of privacy.

Some additional comments from folks who were incarcerated at the same time as Ronnie, backing up the testimonies we have. Unless the case worker is an Asian man, the name there strongly suggests a female employee, assuming that's who Kim Terry is.

Apologies if I'm coming off as voyeuristic, because I'm not trying to be. I'm focused on what's relevant to the band and filling in gaps in their origins. This is the most interesting thing that's happened to FIR since their vanishing act in 2023-24. Also, Ronnie not paying his debts is another thing that is entirely in character.

None of these folks are attacking Ronnie. They seem to legitimately be proud of him for making something of himself and are advocates for prison reform and open about their experiences. They also aren't trying to self-promote or calling Ronnie out on anything. It isn't even "why am I not in your book, you asshole?"; it's "you are not getting the whole story; this is what I remember."

So, these are some of the most credible people who've spoken on FIRonnie in years, because they aren't music scene folks.

Special attention from the case worker, and them being the one who got him the SD card and such, is specifically brought up both by his band friends and this unrelated guy, so it's a known quantity.